Saturday, September 25, 2010

What kind of Man are you anyway?

A recent post on Daddyshome Blog got me thinking what does it mean to be a "man" these days.  That also begs the question of what it means to be a "woman" but I am not touching that one with your ten foot pole.  It seems that there are a lot of different schools of thought from which to form a definition of what a man should be/do.

Biblical - Don't even try throwing Timothy 5:8 at me.  If you do try to use that verse you first need to define "provide."  The word provide shows up 101 times in the NIV according to BibleGateway.com.  Looking at those verses it does not seem that "provide" means go to work and make money.  But hey, that's just me.  If you want to get Biblical on my why don't you try focusing on Ephesians 6:4.  I see way too many Dads exasperating their children and I don't see any Religious "Leaders" doing sermons on that.  I have to admit I am also guilty of it from time but then I try not to throw too many stones, I am too busy worrying about my glass house:)  Also, does anyone consider that the only "true" view of what God really wants a man to be is in Genesis before the fall?  The rest of what the bible says about the relationship between men and women is because of the fall and thus, in my mind is not what God "really" wants of us.  BTW, you either take EVERYTHING in the Bible literally or EVERYTHING is in context.  You choose which way you want it before you start throwing verses my way:)

Personal Experience - Many if not all of us develop our definitions of what "should be" from our experiences. For instance if you are a fan of Mr. Mom, ala 1983, then you probably envision SAHDs as flannel wearing, beard growing, slobs using 220, 221, whatever it takes to get it done.  Or maybe you have read about or met men that do stay at home but don't like it.  

Worldly - Whether we admit it or not this is why most of us scoff at SAHDs.  People always like looking at the 50's and previous decades as the ideal to be lived up to.  Of course you don't want to look past 1920 or women couldn't vote.  You do still think women should vote right?

Here is a little sarcasm on the subject.  OK, more than a little:) - I mean wanting them to be barefoot, pregnant, in the kitchen making pies is one thing but they should be equal to men on somethings right?  Oh, I get it... they can vote but only if they vote the way their "man" tells them to.  I mean, we don't want them thinking for themselves.  If they start doing that they might start getting crazy ideas in their heads like that they can talk in Church.  If they start that foolishness they may start wanting to do a man's job.  Being a secretary or waitress is one thing but do we really want women to start getting advanced degrees?  Sure they can be a teacher and teach boys and girls but we wouldn't want them thinking they can teach men things.  If they started doing things like that who would watch the rug rats while we are out with "the boys" and making all those great decisions like what country to invade next.

Don't even get me started about what to call us SAHDs (Stay at Home Dads).  I know some guys get all sensitive about wanting to be called something else but that sounds a bit like whining to me like how you have to say "do you work outside the home" to women.  I am OK with saying I don't work.  I am a SAHD and proud of it.  But in case someone wants another acronym I propose "THE Man" with "THE" standing for Tactical Home Engineer.  If someone doesn't like what we SAHDs do then they can just go pound sand.  I think it is a far worse sin to be a workaholic and ignore your family while justifying it as "providing" for your family.  If someone thinks being a SAHD is sad, a sin, don't respect it or think someone that does it is not being a man then I only have one thing to say...... jealousy is such an ugly thing ;)

Jealousy is the tribute mediocrity pays to genius.
Fulton J. Sheen

My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard.  Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass."  "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply.  "We're raising boys."  
Harmon Killebrew

He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.  
Clarence Budington Kelland

Al

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