I try to periodically read other SAHD's blogs and a few other websites like AtHomeDad.org. They, like me, periodically discuss the way they are treated as SAHDs and/or Fathers. It seems there is a stereotype out there of SAHDs and Fathers that we are well... inept bafoons at best and miscreants at worst. Even the NY Times is taking up for men.
But as two of my best friends always remind me, there is some truth to stereotypes and many play out to be true in a lot of instances. Of course that would mean that Doctors are selfish egomaniacs that have a God complex and little regard for others as everyone else is beneath them not to mention less educated. Luckily we know that is just not true:)
Instead of fighting the stereotype I am trying to use it to my advantage. I look like a hero if the kids are dressed when we leave the house. Can you imagine any self respecting Mother taking their kids out without combing/brushing their hair? What about in uncoordinated clothes? Dirty faces? I think not! My boys make bed-head look good:) Now I do brush out my Princesses hair every day as I know there is a line that is not to be crossed. But I get A LOT of leeway when it comes to taking care of the kids, doing laundry, cleaning the house and much of the other "Woman's work" that I do on a daily basis.
As a white male I feel that it would be wrong of me to get all fired up about being "discriminated" against as I have benefited from so many stereotypes. For decades and centuries, heck, since we made a "bad choice" in the Garden of Eden Men have received preferential treatment from EVERYONE. So if I periodically run into some ignorant, small/closed minded idiots that judge me on my gender then I figure I should/can just suck it up and take it. Heck, I really do thank God every day that I am a guy.
The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
Lucille S. Harper
If it can't be fixed by duct tape or WD-40, it's a female problem.
Jason Love
Al
It is so hard to obey!
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As you can imagine, we spend a lot of time talking to our kids about making
good choices. We talk about the fact that bad choices have consequences
and ho...
13 years ago
1 comment:
In the book Manhood For Amateurs by Michael Chabon there is a great essay on him at the grocery store with his 20 month old and a woman saying he's such a great dad because he's there with a baby, that is how low the bar is. No one would ever say that to a mom just by watching them hold a baby in the checkout stand. It's a hollow compliment but it is also true that he tries to be a good dad and that it does suck that the bar is so low. You pick your fights and choose what effects you but ultimately it's those kids and your wife that get to decide your designation.
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